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Thread: Really REALLY terrible movies

  1. #76
    Senior Member Couac Addict's Avatar
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    The Giant Claw.
    Apparently, this was meant to be a serious movie (or as serious as any monster movie can be).
    They shot all the acting scenes first, then realised that they couldn't afford an American FX team to create the giant bird. So they hired a Mexican company to do it. They were so over-budget that they couldn't send anyone to oversee the project.
    What you see is what was sent to them...and they were in no financial position to not use it.

    It's quite amusing to watch actors who believe that they are in big budget sci-fi film....and then we cut to Gonzo from the Muppets.

    This space for rent.

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  3. #77
    Senior Member Victor Redseal's Avatar
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    "Sharknado 3" is promising to be rotten. The star, David Hasselhoff, says it will be the worst of them yet and if you can't believe David Hasselhoff in these matters, why are you even living? Besides, Michelle Bachmann and Anne Coulter are in it and hopefully we'll get to see them get eaten! Along with Jerry Springer, a WWE wrestler AND some guy from 'N Sync!!! Now, THAT is getting bang for your buck! I don't care what anyone else says, I'll be tuning in!
    "God," asked Adam, "why did you make Eve so beautiful?"
    And He replied, "So that you could love her."
    "But God," asked Adam, "why did you make her so stupid?"
    And He replied, "So that she could love you."

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  5. #78
    Senior Member Victor Redseal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Couac Addict View Post
    The Giant Claw.
    Apparently, this was meant to be a serious movie (or as serious as any monster movie can be).
    They shot all the acting scenes first, then realised that they couldn't afford an American FX team to create the giant bird. So they hired a Mexican company to do it. They were so over-budget that they couldn't send anyone to oversee the project.
    What you see is what was sent to them...and they were in no financial position to not use it.

    It's quite amusing to watch actors who believe that they are in big budget sci-fi film....and then we cut to Gonzo from the Muppets.

    I saw that as a kid and even then found it pretty funny. Apparently, this was a pinata for some kid's party that didn't get used. You wonder all those hapless people in the movie didn't look up at it and bust out laughing.
    "God," asked Adam, "why did you make Eve so beautiful?"
    And He replied, "So that you could love her."
    "But God," asked Adam, "why did you make her so stupid?"
    And He replied, "So that she could love you."

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  7. #79
    Senior Member geralmar's Avatar
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    The Garbage Pail Kids Movie (1987). Irredeemably vile children's film invokes genocide during the final 15 minutes.

  8. #80
    Senior Member elgars ghost's Avatar
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    Anything featuring that prize oaf Steven Seagal.
    '...a violator of his word, a libertine over head and ears in debt and disgrace, a despiser of domestic ties, the companion of gamblers and demireps, a man who has just closed half a century without a single claim on the gratitude of his country or the respect of posterity...' - Leigh Hunt on the Prince Regent (later George IV).

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  10. #81
    Senior Member Bulldog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by elgars ghost View Post
    Anything featuring that prize oaf Steven Seagal.
    I found 2 or three of his movies quite good (for an action movie).

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  12. #82
    Senior Member Clouds Weep Snowflakes's Avatar
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    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domino_(2005_film)
    Just profanity, nothing else.

  13. #83
    Senior Member Joe B's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clouds Weep Snowflakes View Post
    NOT TRUE!!! There was also plenty of gratuitous violence.
    I love music. I want music. I need music.

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  15. #84
    Senior Member Rogerx's Avatar
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    Magic Mike, not even funny.

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  17. #85
    Senior Member Merl's Avatar
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    The truly awful 'When Saturday Comes'. Based around the appalling acting / football skills of Sean Bean it's truly one of the most badly acted films I've ever seen. Script written by a 5 year old, every terroble cliché in the book and to top it off the truly horrendous Sean 'I have one accent only for whatever role I'm playing' Bean. There's also a moment of pure fiction where Sheffield United win a game, however they were playing manyoo so that's entirely possible. It says something when the best actor in the film is former Leeds United player, Mel Sterland. Even the always dependable Pete Postlethwaite is wooden in this one. Utter shite.


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  19. #86
    Senior Member Joe B's Avatar
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    I know this might raise some feathers, but I do not appreciate Wes Anderson's movies. I think he is a good director, but I do not enjoy his script writing skills. He must be fabulous to work with as actors seem to be lined up to be in his films. I guess Wes is a genuine auteur, but I am not able to comprehend his genius.

    "The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou" is a film which I could not watch to the end. I tried for over an hour to get into the film, but I finally had to stop when I realized I didn't care about a single character. For me character development along with their story arc are essential. For me, "The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou" failed in both respects.

    I love music. I want music. I need music.

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  21. #87
    Senior Member Merl's Avatar
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    In fact I nominate any film that Sean Bean has been in. The Hitcher remake was appalling, he was pathetic in Silent Hill and he even managed to ruin Goldeneye with his terrible 'spy' accent as 006. When they killed him off early in Game of Thrones I actually cheered as they chopped his head off as I knew I'd never have to suffer his wooden Sheffield-ness again.
    Last edited by Merl; Sep-01-2019 at 21:18.

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    Yor, Hunter From the Future = terrible flick. The 'Billy Jack' movies were bad. For some lack of sanity, four of them were made.

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  24. #89
    Senior Member geralmar's Avatar
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    1966

    George Segal portrays the protagonist as a loathsome detestable jerk who, in his attempts to act "cool", only succeeds in coming across as a consumate smart ***. I hated him and kept hoping someone would kill him or at least he would die at the end. The movie also has a ridiculous scene in which Segal, trying to evade some thugs, chooses the one automobile in a garage full of cars that has a bomb strapped to the undercarriage. Either that or the bad guys attached a bomb to every car in the neighborhood. The scene is absolutely illogical. Yet the movie got decent reviews.
    Last edited by geralmar; Sep-12-2019 at 14:23.

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  26. #90
    Senior Member Rogerx's Avatar
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    Planet of the Apes (1968)

    2001, zie Planet of the Apes (2001)
    the reboot 2011, seeRise of the Planet of the Apes
    2014 Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
    2017 War for the Planet of the Apes
    and 14-part television serie 1974.
    All utter crap

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