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Thread: Fiume Nero (Black river)

  1. #16
    Senior Member Vasks's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bulldog View Post
    The piece is well written, played and certainly gives enjoyment of the sad variety. The only criticism I have it that it sounds to me like it was composed over 100 years ago.
    Yes, and as others here will testify, I argue all the time about composers not imitating the past, but rather searching for their own 21st Century voice. However, I did not do so in this instance because (1) no real imitation has occurred and (2) it is fine for a student (of any age) in learning about traditional harmony to compose some pieces in the common practice style.
    Last edited by Vasks; Apr-30-2018 at 01:30.
    "Music in any generation is not what the public thinks of it but what the musicians make of it"....Virgil Thomson

  2. #17
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    My goal was to somewhat stay in classical harmonics rules and voice leading, while improving my own style. I don't really like mordern music and harmonics sadly, but I surely don't copy Bach's or other composers' style, at least I never want to.

  3. #18
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    Where else would you suggest not root position, by the was, Vasks?

  4. #19
    Senior Member Vasks's Avatar
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    You did have a few more than what I thought I heard, ancore but here's a few suggestions:

    m.16 - the second half have an A
    m. 21 - have on beat 3 a B-flat, then on beat 4 pass through A to get to start of m.22’s G
    m.29 - 1st beat have a B-flat for dotted half, go to G on last beat
    m.36 - 1st half E-flat

    Adding a few quarter note passing tones else where like I suggested in m.21 would make the bass part less lethargic and predictable. Look for places where the bass moves by 3rds and experiment.
    Last edited by Vasks; May-01-2018 at 15:30.
    "Music in any generation is not what the public thinks of it but what the musicians make of it"....Virgil Thomson

  5. #20
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    Thanks for the suggestions, I'll have a look at them.

  6. #21
    Senior Member Captainnumber36's Avatar
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    Lovely work, I thoroughly enjoyed it!

    Thanks.

  7. Likes ancore liked this post
  8. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vasks View Post
    Interesting discussion about a key change (no matter how brief). I personally did want one after 2 minutes, or at least some new chords, but a 4-minute piece does not really need one. Beyond 5 minutes, one should most likely be done.

    However, for me the biggest flaw is the flat static nature both color-wise and emotion-wise. Each instrument is locked into doing nearly the exact same thing for the entirety and that means there's also no chance to alter emotion. I think if there had been an intensification of volume and activity after 3 minutes the piece would have had a climax which could then either be the end of the piece or the piece could then recede into its initial emotional state.
    I completely agree with this.
    It is nice and inoffensive piece, but kinda flat because it is all the same throughout and that wouldn't be problem if maybe main idea is stronger. But I do think it's still fine.

  9. #23
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    I think this piece needs a really good accent and outlining and it wouldn't sound too flat to you. I intentionally made its harmonics less radical, however I made some unorthodox moves and voice leading like at m. 28, but I didn't want anything to stick out. Maybe it's my taste, I cant listen to modern coeval music, farest I go is Liszt.
    To sum up, my goal was to draw up a nice and melodic, but melancholic piece

  10. #24
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    'Flat' is maybe too strong word. It's pretty much dreamy and melancholic piece. As such it is pretty good.

    I also think it is piece that should be listened more times to be fully comprehended.
    Last edited by nikola; May-02-2018 at 16:15.

  11. #25
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    Thanks for the correction I purposedly didnt't want to fill this piece with conspicuous melody, thus it lets the audience flow, but with different interpretation it could be much harsh, with faster tempo and stronger outlines of the melody, accenting the flute and the cello at the right place can result in a much more "agressive" piece, that's up to the performers' preference.

  12. #26
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    Don't you think by the way, that it's too short?

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